49 Reasons Not to Meditate (With Thanks to CS&N)

49 reasons, all in a line.

All of them good ones, all of them lies. (49 Bye-Byes, Stephen Stills) 

Over the years, I've heard many reasons why people don't meditate.  Here are some of them, with brief counter-arguments:

1. Meditation is weird. (It's more common than you think. Most cultures do it in some form.)
2. I don't have time. (Yes, you do. You're alive, aren't you?)
3. I don't have space. (You can learn to meditate anywhere.)
4. It's against my religion. (Most, if not all religions integrate meditation into their philosophies.)
5. It's too religious. (There are secular meditation practices.)
6. I can't sit still. (Sitting, standing, walking, lying down: these are the times to meditate.)
7. I meditate when I knit and spin (or whatever). (You probably are relaxing; it's not the same.)
8. I'm too lazy. (Are you breathing?)
9. Meditation is for slackers. (Meditation is simple, but not as easy as you may believe.)
10. I don't like zoning out. (Meditation is zoning in.)
11. I like zoning out. (You can relax and meditate, perhaps just not at the same time.)
12. I'm too tired. (Meditation can improve your energy levels.)
13. I'm too young and inexperienced. (No time like the present.)
14. I'm too old. (No time like the present.)
15. My body is too stiff. (You can meditate lying down.)
16. I'm too sick. (Meditation has been clinically shown to improve health and well-being.)
17. My kids won't let me. (Have them join you.)
18. My cat/dog won't let me. (Close the door. Or meditate on the cat/dog experience.)
19. My partner doesn't like it. (He/she doesn't have to approve.  How do you know this?)
20. It's boring. (Is breathing boring? Do you like chocolate?)
21. I forget to do it. (There are apps for that.)
22. I don't know how to get started. (Find a teacher, a book, an app.  Or just try sitting still.)
23. I'm afraid. (Like any new thing, meditation can feel strange at first.)
24. I don't like stealing from other cultures. (See #1.)
25. Meditation is for spoiled, rich people. (Meditation is accessible to everyone.)
26. Meditation is another way to oppress the poor. (Have you heard of Mr. and Mrs. Gandhi?)
27. I don't like to chant. (I don't either.)
28. I'd rather sleep. (Meditation has been shown to improve sleep patterns.)
29. There's too much going on in the mornings. (Practice before you get out of bed.)
30. When I get home, I just want to eat, relax and go to bed. (You can meditate during the day.)
31. I'm in too much physical pain. (Meditation can alleviate pain and suffering.)
32. I'm in too much emotional pain. (Proceed with caution, but see #31.)
33. Meditation is a cult practice. (Which cult is that, again, please?)
34. I'm afraid I'll disappear. (It's true: your ego may soften and you may become more open.)
35. If I meditate, I won't be able to act normally. (Meditation helps you act more naturally.)
36. I can't meditate alone. (Find a group.  Or start one.)
37. I can't meditate with other people. (You can practice by yourself.)
38. Meditation is for losers. (Meditation can help anyone. Even you.)
39. I'm not enlightened enough. (Are you ever too dirty to wash?)
40. I'll lose my job. (Really?  Perhaps you need to find another job?)
41. I'll lose my friends. (I hope not, but see #40.)
42. I don't like change. (Change happens constantly, whether you like it or not.)
43. I prefer social action. (Meditation helps you engage with the world. See #26.)
44. I'd rather spin, knit, run, whatever. (You can turn these actions into meditation practices.)
45. I don't like feeling high. (You probably won't, unless you're very experienced or very lucky.)
46. I don't want to add to my "to do" list. (Practice meditation as a hobby, not a chore.)
47. Meditation has nothing to do with real life. (Meditation is about experiencing life as it is.)
48. What's the point? (To learn to live Now not relive the past or anticipate the future.)
49. I don't need to meditate. (Yes, yes, you do.  Whether you will or not is up to you.)

Congratulations!  If you've made it through this list, you've just completed a meditation practice.

Namaste.